Cornered

It's one of those days when you feel like giving up and throwing in the towel because things just got too hard. Faced with the most daunting and most painful aspect of a woman's life, I find myself wishing for a different life in a different world, on a different universe. There is one person who lingers constantly in my mind and that person is the reason why I hang on to dear life even when things get beyond tough. I've reached the end of my line with this one. Things just don't feel the same any more. I'm fragile in so many ways, I bet this is all I have going for myself. The mighty pen is my only friend and without it, I am nothing. Just a mere drop in the ocean of intellectuals.

I could have had more then this but I kick myself every time because I know I have failed in so many ways. One day perhaps I too will know what it feels like to be on top of the world without fear of reprisal and retribution. But these are just dreams regardless of how you see it. I cannot be more then what I am now. How I wish I could be bigger and better then this. My transition into the real world would be smoother and simpler. 

Everyone dreams about white picket fences and the like. A perfect home with the trappings of life. The vision of your future children running to you with a smile and a mad lust for life. Those white picket fences have become nothing but imaginary as I try my best to establish my REAL reason for being here. Soft music playing in the background as I type out the entire value of my life. Is this all there is to me?